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Create a Marriage Registry
(It's even more important than a wedding registry!)

Wedding registries are for stuff. A marriage registry, on the other hand, allows friends and family to pledge the support that newlyweds need to sustain a happy, lifelong marriage.

By SHAUN GALLAGHER

Newly engaged couples might spend hours deliberating over the perfect place settings and kitchen appliances to add to their wedding registries.

Yet while a well-stocked wedding registry might help a couple acquire the physical items they need to start their life together, there's a lot more to a strong, successful marriage than just having the right houseware.

After the wedding and honeymoon period are over, married couples are going to need continued love and support to help them grow as individuals and as a couple, endure the inevitable rough patches, and keep their relationship healthy and satisfying through the long haul.

Enter the marriage registry.

As with a wedding registry, friends and family will be invited to pledge to provide the items on the list.

But in a marriage registry, the list is not made up of physical gifts. Rather, it consists of the types of support — social, emotional, spiritual, or otherwise — a couple may need throughout their marriage.

The process of creating a marriage registry can be an important of marriage preparation and can be incorporated into premarital counseling programs. It involves a careful consideration by the couple of some of the challenges they may face during their marriage and also offers ideas for how support from friends and family can help the couple navigate those challenges.

As with a wedding registry, each couple's marriage registry is unique to their relationship. Some couples might recognize that the dynamics of their relationship or the unique attributes of their personalities might require more external support in one area and less in another area.

Unlike a wedding registry, however, it's never too late to build a marriage registry! Even couples who have been married for decades can find the exercise to be a fruitful one.

Create Your Own Marriage Registry

Below are some items you and your fiance or spouse might wish to place on your own marriage registry.

Select the items that you think will apply to your marriage, then submit your selections below.

A free, personalized marriage registry will be generated based on your choices, and you can share it with friends and family!

Support Roles

Relationship Sage A long-married friend or family member who can offer first-hand advice about how to keep a marriage healthy.
Home Improvement Guru A friend or family member who's handy around the house and can offer advice when the faucet springs a leak or the air conditioner starts groaning.
Patient Listener A friend who's willing to provide non-judgmental support when you've hit a rough patch and just need to vent.
Guys' Night Volunteer A friend who's ready to join in on a guys' night out.
Girls' Night Volunteer A friend who's ready to join in on a girls' night out.
Marriage Godparent An older friend or family member who is willing to proactively check in with the couple every once in a while to see how they're doing.
Rollercoaster Adviser A friend or family member who has been through some ups and downs in their own marriage and who is willing to offer advice and support.
Prayer Partner A friend or family member who is willing to lend spiritual support and encouragement by praying with you and your spouse and praying for your marriage.
Double Daters Married friends who are willing to get together for a double date or other group activities.
Personal Finance Tipster A friend or family member to whom the couple can go for help navigating their personal finances, setting a budget, saving and investing, etc.
Counseling Confidante A friend or family member who has been through relationship therapy, marriage counseling, etc. and who can offer practical advice and encouragement.
Head Cheerleader A friend or family member who celebrates your successes and offers encouragement as you strive toward your goals.
Real Estate Whiz A friend or family member who can offer advice and encouragement related to home buying and selling.
A Shoulder to Cry On A friend or family member who will make themselves available to the couple in times of sadness or tragedy.
Sparring Coach A friend or family member who is willing to work with one or both partners to help them learn healthy ways to argue and how to resolve conflicts before they become fights.
Sensational Sitter A friend or family member who is willing to housesit or babysit for the couple.
Comic Relief A friend or family member who's quick with a joke and can inject some levity into serious proceedings.
Foreign Correspondent A friend or family member who lives far away from the couple, but who is willing to exchange letters and cards to encourage them in their relationship.
Single Adventurer A single friend who is willing to join in on the sort of crazy, spur-of-the-moment adventures that married couples might shy away from.
EQ Role Model A friend or family member who's in touch with their own emotions and is willing to work with one or both spouses who might need a little help in that area.
Marriage Study Buddy A friend or family member who is willing to serve as a "study buddy" as you explore what makes a strong and lasting marriage.
Coffee Companion A friend or family member who is willing to occasionally grab a cup of coffee and catch up on what's been going on in your life.
Family Chronicler A family member who knows a lot about your family history and can help you better understand where you came from and pass on the stories of your ancestors.
Auto Enthusiast A friend or family member who's good with cars and can offer guidance about what to buy and what to do when the check-engine light goes on.
Kid Loaner A friend or family member who is willing to let you babysit their child or children so you can get a taste of what parenthood might be like.
Fitness Guru A friend or family member who is enthusiastic about personal fitness and is willing to act as a support person in your efforts to become or stay healthy and strong.
Faith-Filled Friend A friend or family member who is willing to help you and your spouse grow in your faith.
Master of Ceremonies A friend or family member who is organized, pays attention to detail, and knows how to run things efficiently, and who can offer advice and support when planning events.
Music Maven A friend or family member on whom you can rely to recommend the perfect song or playlist.
Career Advisor A friend or family member with lots of job experience who's willing to critique a resume, offer advice about career advancement, or listen as you practice an entrepreneurial pitch.
Sports Sidekick A sports-loving friend or family member who's ready to support you and your spouse by engaging your athletic side: joining you for a pick-up game, talking fantasy league picks, or getting together to watch a big game.
Dining Partner A friend or family member who's willing to get together for a good meal and deep conversation.
Adulting Adviser A friend or family member who's willing to offer advice and guidance on things every responsible adult should know how to do but never learned in school.
Cautionary Tale A friend or family member who's made more than their fair share of mistakes, and who's willing to have frank discussions about what not to do in a committed relationship.
Close Confidante A friend or family member in whom the couple can confide when they're facing difficulties and who can both be an active listener and direct the couple to professional resources that might help.
Blended Family Mentor A friend or family member who has experience navigating the unique challenges of a blended family and who is willing to talk about their experiences and offer emotional support and guidance.
Kindred Spirit A friend or family member whose interests or experiences are similar to those of one or both spouses and who is willing to use those commonalities to encourage them and boost up their marriage.
Political Pundit A friend or family member who is willing to engage you in political discussions and who has the temperament to not let heated discussions get in the way of your relationship.
Accountability Partner A friend or family member who is willing to help one or both spouse keep a commitment in some area of their life, whether it be a moral commitment, a commitment to avoid a vice like smoking or drinking, or a commitment to achieve some other personal goal.
Retreat Coordinator A friend or family member who has some extra space and can occasionally host you and your spouse so you can "get away from it all" and reconnect.

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